Tired of dating apps? Try Nielsen Tennis Center Partner Signup The Badger Herald

Welcome to the second semester my single friends! If you are here in Madison, I hope you had a wonderful stay. If you immediately went abroad to study abroad, leave.

I know what you thought when you read this headline: Katie, shit, I’m trying to find a date, not a tennis partner!

Well, I’m here to tell you that these two could very well be the same thing. If you don’t play tennis but think you can learn for a chance to find true love, keep reading. If you don’t play tennis and you don’t think you can learn, you’re an idiot because of course you can learn!

For those who don’t know, our school’s tennis stadium has a spreadsheet on their website where people can list their names, skill level and contact details for others to message and play. .

Surprisingly, people haven’t thought of using it for dating. I can’t get the idea – people literally post their names and numbers online with the intention of finding a mate – what else would you use it for?

First, let’s look at the alternative and why it no longer works.

The dating app, designed by and for somewhat horny but mostly lonely people, hit the scene in the late 90s. I’m playing here, but I’m pretty sure it revolutionized dating and does a lot for technology and everything.

The thing is, we had online dating a while ago and despite its average success rate, I think college students are made to break new ground and start fights in pop culture. Basically, to start the fight, try to turn your tennis partner into your perfect match.

While apps like Tinder and Hinge are great for people looking for more casual gratification, the constant surface-level conversations you have with others on these sites will never produce the intense, deep connections that the sweet game of tennis could offer.

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A fun fact is that the inventor of tennis was named Tom, and according to History he named the value zero in the score “love” because he believed people were meant to find love in tennis. Doesn’t that make you want to cry? I want to vomit just thinking about it.

I believe in this idea more than I have ever believed in anything, so I went out and collected testimonials from students on the UW campus who tried the NPS (Nielsen Partner Signup™) .

Sophomore Julie Hoffman, who just got out of a situation with a Tinder hookup in September, credited NPS with having a great singles network.

“I looked at the list of partners and just texted someone randomly,” Hoffman told the Herald. “Next thing I know, we bond over movies while practicing volleys and now we’re getting married next month.”

WOW! Can you believe that? All that while playing a little tennis? Talk about fate.

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Hoffman added that she likes NPS more than other dating apps because the other partner doesn’t know you’re just going there to hang out with her.

“So telling a new single partner you’re looking to date has some predatory undertones, so I went under the radar with this one,” Hoffman said. “It was good that she didn’t know I wanted a girlfriend because it allowed us to form an organic relationship. My last Tinder connection knew I wanted to date and it made me feel vulnerable and open. to attacks.

Senior Jake Bee agreed that tennis provided a great disguise for his romantic motivations.

“I usually suffer from chronic nervous sweating when I go on dates,” Bee shared shamefully. “So being able to talk about our lives without the pressure of a date made me sweat a lot less, which is good.”

And even for the slip-ups where Bee sweats too much, he says he can just blame tennis!

After a fruitless fling with Hinge, senior Alex Perez predicts tennis partner websites are the future of dating.

“Look, I don’t even like tennis. I just love texting new people and meeting them for a magical night of an epic ball,” Perez said.

In conclusion, if you’re tired of the dating app game, I urge you to turn to the underutilized world of recreation center contact lists. There’s even a Facebook group, so honestly, it couldn’t be easier.

If you want a friend, if you want a lover, skip to the Nielsen Tennis Center partner signup – you never know what you might find.

About Jimmie P. Ricks

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